The ‘Mighty’ Pen’s Journey From A Sword To A Swiss Knife

Saturday, November 29, 2008

Am I going to cry too often..

The last time I came close to tears was when I saw the two movies (Jacob the liar and Life is Beautiful) about the gruesome era of the Nazi’s ( And this time around again we have the Nazi’s of a different kind. Different but more or less the same. They too take away something they have no right to take. It’s simple you only take something that you have given. So my life is for the person to take, who gave it to me.

The recent terror attack on Mumbai makes me just sad, not angry. The anger is growing numb due to the frequency of such events. Have no one to blame. Not the politicians, the security agencies, Pakistan….and the list can go on. Can hurl abuses on all and say this could have been avoided :

IF the Politicians were doing what they are meant to do
IF the security agencies were proactive rather than reactive
IF Pakistan works more aggressively in uprooting the terrorist’s camps bustling in its vicinity
IF only our anti-terrorism legal framework was more robust
There are always a zillion “If’s” after a tragedy takes place. If only and this would not have happened. But what’s the point I wonder. The root of the entire hostage ordeal that lasted 41 hours would not even be these young men in their bare 20’s. Raised in madrasas from a very young age, violence, terror, hatred is injected in their DNA. Roaring to go ahead and execute such operations requires a mastermind. But this is the Mastermind of the “HOW and WHAT”. Do they really possess the rationality to question the “WHY”. A young child raised to be a terrorist??

Am just tired of all the debates that such incidents give way to. The more I watch, the more I read, the more I hear, I dig myself deeper into a whirlpool of questions that will never really have a black or white answer. Even if there is an answer somewhere, who frees me of the gloom and terror flooding my heart. The terror of what’s next and sad about what will it finally culminate into. Like termites rot my world bit by bit leading to a hollow. Exactly my feeling right now, hollow….

Just wish, oh so badly wish I don’t cry too often!

Saturday, October 25, 2008

“Jacob the Liar” and “Life is Beautiful” - The undying spirit of the Holocaust era!

60 years ago the Nazis invaded the world. The injustice and cruelty they inflicted upon the Jews is for all to know. The genocide of approximately six million European Jews during World War II, was just a chapter in History for me back in school. A lesson for me to cram and pass the most obnoxious subject ever. Getting rid of people by burning them in gas chambers was gruesome even then, but it never hit me that hard. Unperturbed by the extremity, I looked at it as one of those many acts of the past and present where man is his own biggest enemy. Thus I moved on just fine with the word “Holocaust”, a word that needed to be underlined to catch the examiner’s attention.

This until I stumbled upon two masterpieces “Life is Beautiful” and “Jacob the Liar”. The common thread among these two movies is obviously much more than the horrifying concentration camps. It is the human spirit that steals the show and moves even a supposedly “strong hearted” person like me close to tears.

The protagonist played by Robin Williams in Jacob the Liar finds himself midst a controversy after he tells a frustrated friend to hold on as the Red Army is on its way to rescue them all. He overhears this piece of news on the radio after he is caught outside after the curfew is imposed and taken to the German army’s barracks. So moved by the news, this friend goes and spreads the word that Jacob (Robin Williams) has a radio, thus making him the single point source of information of what lies in store for them. He now constantly lives a life on the edge because he will be slaughtered to death by the Germans if they suspect a radio with anyone apart from them. Jacob plays along with the lie after he discovers that the number of suicide’s in the ghetto are going down as hope engulfs many.

The lies galore in “Life is Beautiful” too where Guido Orefice (played by Roberto Benigni) tells his son that the concentration camp is a game. Where the person who gains 1000 points wins a tank and one loses points when one complains or sulks. Guido keeps his son to play along by reminding him that they are leading and the tank will be there’s any moment now.

Thus in both these movies a plain simple lie is what makes someone else push a little harder for existence in the unbearable conditions. To hold on as a better, brighter future awaits them. For some more time and then everything would be just like it was before the Nazis swept their lives with dread. Soon their lies catch up with Jacob and Guido and are killed by the Nazi’s. From the debris of these free spirited souls is born a tomorrow for someone else. Lies that took their own life but provided buoyancy to others to swim through tough waters and sail to the shore!

Saturday, April 26, 2008

"Hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy"'s answer to the demolition drive.

Just tumbled on one of the funny books have read in my lifetime..especially sci-fiction..never thought this genre would bring me such joy,this until "The Hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy" happened to me..Wrapped with a random sense of humour that tickles my funny bone for sure..

Can't help but share an incident that completely empathises with the demolition drive, the relocation drive rather, that happens every time a flyover or a metro is added to my lovely city called Delhi..(its bizaare, chaotic, strange,steady,hot,dirty)..but love it irrespective!!!

Here the protaganist's (Arthur) house bears the brunt of a bypass that is being built..The way the author rationalises the futility of building a bypass made me guffaw and snort like a wild pig..He says:

"Bypasses are devices that allow some people to dash from point A topoint B very fast while other people dash from point B to point A veryfast. People living at point C, being a point directly in between, are often given to wonder what's so great about point A that so many peoplefrom point B are so keen to get there and what's so great about point B that so many people from point A are so keen to get there. They oftenwish that people would just once and for all work out where the hell they wanted to be."

Beat the heat my way..GO BALD!

The obsessive person that I am, forever going mad and crazy about something..well am taking this to an all together different level now..something within me is pushing me to go near to making my way to some saloon, barber, nayi..well in this case does it really competition of skills happening;)..its like running a bulldozer on an uneven surface to make it nice n smooth..

Whats pushing me to this..nothing..just get these spurts of uneasiness..that push me to get up and change some bit of my world..and once thats done..something else has to change or go(this time its a "GO")

And every year when the Delhi heat gets to me..i lose my nerves and feel that this is the shortcut to Antarctica! of my friends has done just that this summer..and he is trying to convince me to do the same.. he adds spice to his life by fueling my weird fantasies..he made me stalk a man you know where we coming from..

So what do I do..will it be a mistake..well there are more chances of it being one than a success..but am sure within a few months will grow it all back..maybe a better bunch..
My mum dreads meeting me every evening ever since she has discovered this new beast that possesses me..she wants to die before she see's me this way..

Oh hell..what do I do..take a plunge or just contemplate and make others to do the same..something will happen soon to my already little left(not to mention just had a cut last week) see the early signs to a very unstable "hairy" state of mind
just a small crossover it will sounds comforting..and convincing..well lets wait and watch..which way does the Persis Khambatta in me take!

Sunday, April 13, 2008

If only blowing off flames could get you freedom..

The other day a drive down to Khan Market with my chaddi pal Joanna got us talking about the blowing off of the Olympic torch..what a coincidence we were dropping her younger sister for athletic practice at the Jawaharlal Nehru no we two dont move are asses that much..we just exercise our mouths to discuss such incidents and eat..So in the midst of heading to Eatopia to satiate our not so hungry tummies with chicken wings and momos, got us talking..

Was this attempt an exercise in futility is what I wonder..completely emphatise with the sentiments of the people of Tibet who have been fighting for something that is their own..struggling to call their home "home"...accept that it was an act to get retaliate..but the point here is that the decision makers know enough about the whole yes new eyeballs this would fetch..but the masses who don't know about it already am sure will remember it as an act of rebellion and the cause behind it might just fade what is the right or wrong idea...does silence work or random acts of rage?..

Also when Amir Khan decides against banning the run with the torch..he is being anything but rational..a rational brand ambassador for the sponsor's of the Olympic games(read:Coke) the moral police here better not raise eyebrows and force him to make statements like "I will run with a prayer for the Tibetans in my heart"..he will run my friends, with a heavy heart and errr pocket!

P.S. Please Mr. Khan ignore the sarcasm here..the colour of money makes us run faster than we can..(there I go again..ignore this too)

Sunday, March 30, 2008

When ears become prickling needles!

This past week was in touch with a colleague in the Mumbai office over a ship "Queen Victoria" we were trying to dock..This I think was my third o fourth conversation with him..Now that we figured out what is to be done for the queen, the final adios was just round the corner...well not yet.. hold on..This amazingly insightful person says, " Mansi I think you should get your haemoglobin checked" isn't this a blessing..a blessing for the entire human race..
A solution to all those prickling needles which suck blood out of us with an "aahh".. no need of visiting those white doctor cubicles where forever the stench of medicine next time you feeling nauseous..just dial a mumbai number(oh how i wish i could leave a number) and say "Yai yai doctor) in your ears right now should play "Heal the world"..and btw I too can bet that the singer here Michael Jackson suffers from ahem ahem hemoglobin deficiency..

And you..yes yes talking to these pair of eyes looking into my blog..go get your corneas checked!

Thursday, March 27, 2008

50 things I know about myself..

1. I absolutely detest personal mails written like it were a Market Research questionnaire..
2. Love extra chicken in my Chicken Sub..but hate paying extra for it..
3. Don't think there's a better way to eat rice but with hands on a banana leaf..
4. I find lists like 50 Things I hate about you, 50 Things to do during a Sermon!, 50 Signs your Spouse Loves your Cat more than They Love, 50 Places to build a Snowman!, 50 Bugs/Insects to find in your bowl of Soup! rather silly...(these are real lists people have tried putting down, not an attempt to crack you up) ..But still game for "50 things Mansi knows about herself”..
5. Love boasting about how I helped anchor a ship in Port Blair..
6. I am dangerous combo of impulsiveness and clumsiness, the first one to walk on a floor with a "Wet floor" sign to test its truthfulness and the first one to slip on it too..
7. The thought of scratching ones nails on wall irks me like hell and I often think of it.
8. Have stalked a man along with a man just for fun..
9. Have slipped from landscaped hills during my attempts to spy on people trying to answer their "nature's call"..
10. Am yet to date a man of my age group..
11. Enjoy watching a co-worker peel an orange with army precession..
12. Think its very very silly for woman wearing a navel revealing top, trying to hide the navel by pulling the top down again and again..
13. Hate men who scratch their balls in public with an air that its almost like scratching your head when deep in thought..
14. Just reviving from the phase of watching cheap movies in the front row of cheap movie halls with cheap men blurting cheap comments and enjoying every bit of it!!
15. Absolutely hate men who pee on toilet seats and then dont wipe it after use..."well a woman who wants to sit on it will wipe it or can just mount it and relieve her bladder"..aarghh..feel like putting their heads in the commode..
16. Have a habit of mixing all the dal,sabji, curd and rice together and then eating it with chapatti..
17. I can eat with chopsticks..
18. I am an elaichi tea addict, often get up at 3 to make myself a cuppa..
19. Hate dudh wali chai, like mine to be strong with little sugar and obviously the elaichi..
20. I am an emotional eater..
21. As a teenager have struggled with weight..was once 82kgs and have fought hard to bring it down to a healthy 62.25 kgs.
22. I wish was atleast 3 inches taller.
23. Love the endorphin rush I get after exercising..
24. Am the only non-vegetarian in my family of devout vegetarians, love disgusting my mother about how a chicken is cut and this when she is having her meal..
25. Don't think I can ever grow my finger nails, long nails feel like weights tighed at the end of the fingers..
26. I smile when am terribly embarrassed
27. Hate make-up otherwise, but can not do without kajal..think I look sick without it now.
28. Love silver oxidized earrings, seldom you will find me without it.
29. I will never color my graying hair..almost look forward to my short jet white hair..
30. I prefer dressing according to my body type..
31. I can make myself look rich and classy dressed in clothes from Sarojni o Janpath..
32. I have an "earthy" sense of style..
33. I often overanalyze the most trivial things..
34. Most people think am the coolest person around, but am more often than not anxious about something or the other..
35. I think its unfair to judge people because we will see ourselves doing the same thing when faced by the same circumstances as the person we judging right now..
36. I often get up with a jerk in the middle of the night with a feeling that I have just fallen from somewhere..
37. I have learnt to be a listener

38. I know I will find my final true love one day, but feel that will come to me after a million heart aches..
39. I can plant my ass at a public place and watch people for hours without getting bored..
40. 5 years from now I will be a countrywoman playing guitar and mooing cows with my horse..
41. Let go of my previous resolutions when struck by an intense wave of passion…lose every bit of rationality in such a state..
42. Hate infidelity, believe its just not right to sail in two boats..those few things in life which are either black or white..force myself to look away from the grey here..
43. I often dream and obsess about something I so badly want to happen, but easily get bored when it materializes..
44. I am not a sweet, goody-goody person..if I don't like a person make sure he/she knows it..
45. Am absolutely scared of back stabbers..
46. My anger is like a champagne bursts out..but fizzes out really soon..
47. I often say things I don't mean when angry, believe in giving my 100% in getting angry and making the other person angry..
48. Love splurging on close friends and family, expect them to do the same once in a while if not as often as I do..
49. I am most likely to count wrong from 1 to 50
50. Hate it when I have 999 things to say, but can only say 50..

22..and still dont know myself !!!

It's like probing your inner self..turning unturned know what lies beneath..i kinda feel..infact feel very very strongly that its tough knowing yourself..we spend years trying to understand others..without realizing how little we know about ourselves..and its not as discreet as I love mercedes..i hate BMW..i love john lenon..i hate prabhu deva..i love jalebi..i hate olives..
Its like I don't know how to put it..but will try..u know we behave in a certain pattern..why we do something we do..why we react to something and absolutely numb to the other..why we think what we think..there's a story behind it..thats the door to the real you..and unlocking that door is very difficult..but this way atleast we looking for the keys..u know what I mean?

So writing is like a journey of self discovery..thats what I love about the whole just said yai yai to the dormant writer in me to get closer to this stranger called "Mansi"..

Saturday, March 22, 2008

Am a finally finally a idea what am I going to write with thousands watching...will i be just myself o web words to make an impression! i here to manipulate minds or is this is an outlet to my inner turbulent self?..if it is that why can't i just make a nice "My Diary"..Why am I a blogger?...I wonder!

I often don't have answers to half the questions I ask myself or things I do?..if u do, let me know...and help me know myself better..